The Long Game

Coexisting with Your Inner Voice

You should just quit music….

You should just pack it up and take up a job that more secure.

The music industry just isn’t for you…

You'll never be able to compete with the pros.

You're spending way too much time on this mix, and it still doesn't sound right.

Who hasn’t heard this voice?

Who hasn’t felt their own inner critic sneak up and put a knife in the back of their motivations and goals?

For years, this voice held me back, whispering stories of my shortcomings and convincing me to choose security over my passions.

It lulled my ambitions to sleep, and the pain of unfulfilled potential slowly began to rise.

Then life would offer up these little reminders.

I'd hear about a friend getting noticed after years of dedication, and the voice would whisper "You're so far behind, dude. You'll never catch up!"

Or I'd hear new music from a favorite artist, and instead of enjoying the track, I'd feel a dose of guilt wash over me.

They were creating the music I wanted to make while I was merely consuming it.

The Roots of Self-Doubt

But where does all this negativity even come from?

For some, that question may be attached to deeper emotions and memories over the course of their life.

For me, there are a few key factors that have amplified this negative voice within my own head.

All minds, and especially some personality types, are prone to certain patterns of thinking that can amplify negative self-talk.

These are called cognitive distortions.

On my journey, I've discovered that I'm especially susceptible to certain patterns more than others.

For me, it was easy to fall into these patterns of cognitive distortions:

• all-or-nothing thinking

• assuming the worst

• sensitivity to criticism

In my mind, success as an audio engineer was black and white.

You were either pro, or complete shit. No in-between.

This rigid mindset pushed me to strive for perfection, but it also left me vulnerable when things weren't perfect.

Every time I sent a mix to a client, I'd anxiously wait for their response, already convinced they would hate it.

Feedback from mentors, even when constructive, felt like confirmation of my perceived failure.

This mindset became a self-fulfilling prophecy - the fear of not being good enough prevented me from taking the very actions that would help me improve.

Instead, I let those negative thoughts cycle through my mind until they paralyzed me completely.

Thriving in a Competitive Landscape

This feeling resonates deeply with many audio engineers.

In our field, success demands a delicate balance of artistic sensitivity and technical mastery, all while being judged through the lens of subjective opinions and fierce competition.

It's in this high-pressure environment that the inner critic finds its strongest voice.

As I made the conscious decision to go all in, I paid less attention to this voice and more attention to the small steps in front of me.

I thought that maybe if I filled my mind with knowledge and practiced my skills, that over time this voice would just starve to the point of death.

That it would just melt away as I started to level up and move closer to my own path.

Little did I know that my propensity for perfectionism would become a trap.

In audio, that drive can be a powerful asset, pushing you to refine every detail and hold yourself to high standards — standards that can be incredibly difficult to meet.

It can become a trap leading to endless tweaking, second-guessing your creative decisions, and ultimately paralyzing you.

It was this double edge that left the door wide open for that little voice to burst right out of its Trojan horse and wreak real damage when I had my guard down.

In the world of music, whether artistic or technical, the pressure to perform at your best, combined with society's expectations of "success" and the industry's competitive nature, make living with this unchecked voice impossible.

If you've made it this far, there's a good chance you can relate.

But I'm here to tell you that you're not alone, and more importantly, that you can learn to manage this inner critic.

In this article, I'll share the strategies I've learned to coexist with this voice, to use it as fuel, rather than letting it silence my creative potential.

You can quickly see how these thoughts were not serving me.

But in the heat of the moment, those thoughts have a way of making you blind to reality.

The inner critic works in very calculated ways to remain the voice on your shoulder steering the ship.

The louder the voice, the more critical the thoughts—we avoid the pain of actual failure, thus avoiding the reward of growth in return.

We stay exactly where that voice wants us to.

Playing the Right Game

My "fear of failure" is what held me back for so long.

That voice would paint vivid pictures of what others would think of me if I failed, if I put myself out there, if I actually pushed towards the things I wanted.

Then as I was able to finally take back control, start small, and move closer to my ideals, the voice pivoted—now making me "fear success".

That voice will do what it has to do to remain in control.

But with some awareness and focus we can remain the ones behind the wheel.

Any industry or field you want to pursue is much like one big game.

Games have rules, frameworks, and various paths we can take to reach the final reward.

The music industry is no different.

The first key thing I had to internalize to start moving forward was understanding the framework of the game I was playing.

The music industry is full of other producers and engineers who want to be better than you.

They wake up every day with purpose and drive, pushing one step closer to their ideal.

The reality of just how competitive this game was nearly destroyed me in the beginning.

You constantly find yourself looking at what others are doing, carrying the weight of "not enough" etched into your back.

I thought this mindset was necessary to succeed and move forward.

But when I zoomed out and gained perspective on the bigger picture, I realized this route was just one path—and it wasn't leading to my end goal.

By seeing the full framework, I understood that while competition is part of the game's rules, the only competition that truly mattered was against my own previous attempts.

This realization relieved so much pressure and brought me much more clarity in the end.

This mindset can seep into many other areas of the field.

Plugin companies prey on these insecurities, selling you the idea your trash unless you buy their latest tools.

Feedback on your music can spiral you into an existential crisis where you question your abilities even after spending years developing yourself.

You see others' success and convince yourself you don't measure up.

Awareness is the first step to taking back control.

Practical Strategies

Creative fields are especially vulnerable to self-criticism, as the subjective nature of art creates a constant thirst for validation.

This vulnerability surfaced when I finally started to trust my skills enough to put myself out there.

As you might expect, that inner voice makes navigating social media particularly challenging.

Caught in comparison traps and mind games, everything I saw on social media seemed to highlight my own perceived shortcomings.

With so much emphasis on letting others see into your world, I worried they might see that I'm not as good as I think I am.

What I couldn't see then—which is so obvious now—is that social media is often a curated highlight reel.

These are merely snapshots of people's journeys, often carefully crafted to project an image of effortless success.

No one posts about the hours of struggle, the self-doubt, or the countless rejections they faced.

Now I'm not trying to tell you that having an inner critic is a bad thing.

I know that not everyone deals with these issues in the same way—the inner critic can be valuable to your growth when you have a healthy relationship with it.

For those who feel similar and have a hard time dealing with this inner critic, recognizing these thoughts and separating them can help you get enough space to really see if these thoughts are serving you and your goals.

I've learned to pay more attention to what's being said by that voice.

The sure signs for me are phrases like:

• "This is amateur" (because it taps into my fear of being seen as inadequate)

• "All this time wasted!" (because it fuels my anxiety about productivity and progress)

• "You really should just quit" (the ultimate fear)

This alerts me that I may have slipped and let the critic take the wheel.

If you truly start to see the bigger picture, you can begin to find the triggers that amplify this voice in your head.

I started to notice specific triggers like:

• harsh criticisms (even when constructive)

• public attempts at success (like releasing a new track or sharing a mix online)

• those long hours spent working on projects with no clear aim

These situations would rattle the critic's cage, and I could feel weeks, months, and sometimes even years of progress threatened.

What helped me was creating enough mental space to understand the intention behind these thoughts.

What purpose does believing and identifying with these thoughts serve?

Do these thoughts help me grow?

This led me to discover one of the most powerful tools to combat this voice: perspective.

Once I realized this voice wasn't necessarily my true feelings or desires, I could see how I had used it as a self-sabotaging behavior for much of my life.

I've now transformed my relationship with these feelings. When that voice tries to tear me down, I recognize those areas as opportunities for growth and development.

I now lean into those areas that once kept me paralyzed.

The biggest reason I bring up the voice inside your head that's holding you back is because I don't think most people see the impact it has on their life's work.

Creative paralysis can lead to procrastination, avoidance of the art itself, and the inability to finish songs because they "just aren't ready yet."

Leading us to suffocate the creative spark within us by playing it safe and staying in our comfort zone.

The only way to grow is by stretching beyond that zone, pushing just a little further than before.

But if this critical voice takes root and infects the host, the emotional toll of constantly battling self-doubt can lead to burnout, depression, and quitting the very thing that once fueled our passion.

Tools for the Journey

After I started to see the impact of this on my work I started to try to find things I could practically do to gain control.

I have found a few things that have worked for me:

• getting a new perspective

• walking away for a while

• being more mindful of my thoughts during my work

• celebrating small win

• hitting up a friend to catch up

For me, the most practical approach that consistently brings clarity is getting a different perspective on my work.

Though it's the most effective method, it's often the hardest.

It requires stepping outside of my comfort zone and allowing someone else to offer honest feedback.

I often spend hours deeply focused on my work, which naturally creates a strong attachment and makes it difficult to see flaws.

Having someone i trust provide feedback can help me gain a more objective view.

The more objective this person is, the better…

Ideal feedback comes from those who care enough about my growth to give me hard truths while pushing me beyond my comfort zone.

Any time i start to sense that voice coming to the surface, I know it's time to print what I have and get a second opinion before i dig myself deeper into self-doubt.

As I mentioned, while this is the most effective method, it's sometimes the hardest to do.

You can also gain perspective by simply walking away from your work for a while.

I take breaks often, especially after long focus sessions, and I find that when these thoughts arise, getting outside for a 30-minute walk can shift my perspective, give my ears a rest, and provide the objective clarity needed to find a way forward.

And I think that's the core way to escape these thoughts…

You need to do something that creates enough space between you and the critique.

One powerful method is celebrating small wins and while it's incredibly easy to do, we often skip this crucial step.

That's why I make it a point to consciously acknowledge and celebrate even the smallest accomplishments.

This is crucial not only for success and dopamine (a topic for another story), but also because these moments force us to reflect on our progress.

If we never celebrate the small steps, it's easy to get lost in the inner critic's negativity.

Consistently acknowledging our growth reinforces positive momentum and makes it easier to silence that inner voice.

Like I said in the beginning some will deal with this to a greater extent the others but I want to make this clear that there is no magic pill you can take to make this voice go away.

We’re playing the long game.

Learning to handle these thoughts in a healthier way takes time and practice.

Building new patterns to manage them when they surface is a gradual process and it will take time in the beginning, and that's perfectly normal.

The key is first recognizing these thoughts, then taking consistent action to address them.

Even today, I'm working on treating myself with the same kindness I show to friends and family.

Remember:

• the only one you should be competing against is yourself.

• just as you wouldn't criticize a friend for not being perfect right away, you need to extend that same patience to yourself.

Mastering this skill will take you far in the industry.

The ability to bounce back from criticism and manage self-doubt is invaluable in the music industry.